Getting alone time as a busy mom, whether you work or are a stay-at-home parent, can be difficult. If you aren’t trying to wrangle them up for bath time, you’re making dinner, doing the laundry, or simply running the household. Here are a few reasons why alone time is essential and how to get more of it.
Self-Care
When you aren’t a parent, you have tons more time for self-care. Much like choosing one of the best vape flavours, you have time to choose how you are going to spoil yourself on any given day.
Self-care, whether it be having a relaxing bath or working out, not only makes you feel better about yourself but also helps you relax, relieve stress, and
Prevents Resentment
Resentment is a difficult emotion to not feel when all of your time and effort revolves around other people. While resentment towards your children because of this isn’t totally unheard of and also doesn’t make you a bad parent, it is good to avoid it.
Resentment can also show itself in different ways; you become impatient, you don’t put in that much effort to making their meals, or something similar. Once again, this is very common and doesn’t make you a bad parent; it is just something to be aware of and actively avoid.
Refills Your Compassion Meter
One of the biggest challenges facing parents is ensuring they are emotionally available 24/7. Whether it be for your children, partner, or both, it can be difficult to have to care about everyone all the time constantly.
This is another common occurrence and one that happens in all aspects of life, not just parenthood. Giving yourself time to refill this meter means you never have to feel tapped out and can be on top of your game for more of the day.
Helps You Reconnect with Your “Old” Self
Another common part of being a parent is feeling like you have lost your “old” self. You don’t do the same hobbies; you don’t have time to do all the things you used to do before kids, like lunch with friends or sitting and reading a book.
While this is a noticeable change that happens, being a parent doesn’t mean you have to give these things up. These small joys brought you happiness and calm before being a parent; they can still do that after having children.
How to Get More Alone Time
Now that we have discussed why alone time is important, here are a few ways to get more of it, even on your busiest days.
Go for a Walk
One of the easiest and best ways to get alone time is to simply go for a walk. Whether it is for an hour or for 10 minutes, getting some fresh air with the quiet around you will give you an energy boost and allow you to recharge your batteries.
If you have the option, use the weekend for longer outings; ask your partner to watch the kids for a few hours and go for a long walk or a hike.
Shift Responsibilities
Speaking of asking your partner for help, it should be common for you to switch up responsibilities with them. If you usually do bath time or make dinner, ask your partner to do it instead; this may only get you an hour of free time, but it is an extra hour you never had before.
This is also something you should be discussing regularly; if you have had a particularly tough day, speak to your partner about it and make it clear that them taking on a small extra responsibility will give you the extra time you need to relax and recharge.
Maximize the Evening
When you have younger children, the evening is perfect for getting some alone time. You can sit and watch a movie, enjoy one of your hobbies, or just quietly have a cup of tea and read a book.
You can also take it a step further and just leave a few of your evening chores for the next day, such as cleaning up after dinner or something similar. This will give you even more time for yourself that you can enjoy however you please.
Spend Extra Time in the Shower/Bath
One small treat you can give yourself daily is not to rush your showers or baths. Far too many parents feel like they need to be in and out as quickly as possible because they think chaos is about to break out.
If your partner is at home, just take your time. This is meant to be personal time anyway; therefore, spending 10 or 15 extra minutes in the bathroom will barely make a difference.
“Sneaky” Games
Finally, if you want to eke out a few more minutes to yourself, you can play a few games with your kids to make it happen, namely, hide and seek. However, you aren’t going to be doing any hiding.
While this is a bit “shady,” simply telling your kids to go hide and you will find them is a fun way to get ten extra minutes on the couch.