Be clear on what you want. Those who don’t understand what they are looking for in a romantic interaction often mislead others.
Casual dating does not mean casual sex. It means you’re dating without the goal of an exclusive relationship. You still plan dates and have conversations to determine romantic compatibility, but you’re not dating a single person. Otherwise, the process is much the same.
Someone who’s just looking for sex might willfully mislead another. A woman might agree to casual sex with the idea of it evolving into a long-term relationship, where the guy does not have this intention.
Tips on casual dating
Be a little early to the date. If you need to cancel, do so as long in advance as possible and provide a legitimate reason. Suggest an alternative date and time to go out.
You don’t want to be too direct about who you are, but your behavior shouldn’t be too perfect because you’ll struggle to maintain that standard later. If you’re not talkative, don’t force yourself to talk the whole time, but try to speak more than you usually would.
Shorter dates are better. It’s better to be left wanting more than to get tired. If you really hit it off, you can extend the date a little.
You won’t have the same goals
Casual dating involves getting used to meeting many people who are looking for different things. You still need to go out, meet and talk to dates, and learn to weed out serial cheaters.
Statistics show that a person who’s cheated in the past is three times more likely to cheat again. It works both ways: a person who has been cheated on in the past is two to four times more likely to be cheated on again, like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Men and women are equally likely to cheat or fall victim to infidelity.
Reciprocity is good to aspire to, even if you’re dating casually. Consider what’s in it for the other person. What do you have to offer? Be respectful and attentive, and don’t dump trauma on your date.
Don’t worry if it doesn’t lead to a second date
We sometimes fail despite our best efforts. A survey by Syndey Horning Herald found that just 700 of 3,500 singles on a dating site always got a second date with someone. Your chance of going out again might be as low as 10% because either of you could decline a second date.
If you hit it off, who initiates the second date? Ideally, it should be the person who did not ask for the first one. You should not wait more than one week for the second one.
When honesty is a casualty on the battlefield of online dating
Unfortunately, dating app users often resort to deception to secure a first date with someone. In 2024, 53% of people lie on their dating profiles. One of the most prominent and damaging forms of deception is catfishing. These incidents have increased by a staggering 70% in the past five years. 30% of online dating profiles are fake, and 20% of catfish use fake photos.
Catfish are most likely to target people aged 45-64, but 86% of their victims are under 35. Interestingly, revenge is what motivates most catfish (64%).
Not all users who mislead others are catfish, obviously. Some dating app users are only on the platforms to receive matches, messages, and likes. They boost their ego and give them a sense of validation.
Some people see these platforms as a form of entertainment. They swipe and chat without any real dating goals.
Finally, individuals might want to fulfill fantasies online or experiment with different personas without the intention of an actual relationship.
The bottom line
A dating app user who doesn’t know what they’re looking for crosses the fine line between casual dating and misleading intentions without realizing it. People deceiving others willfully, those who don’t intend to meet anyone in real life, and those seeking attention and validation are firmly on the side of misleading intentions.