Hello and welcome back to nother installment of New Mum Stories. This week I’m honoured to present Angela from The Inspiration Edit. Angela shares with us her story of being a single mum.
Over To You Angela…
My New Mum Story
I always wanted to be a mother, It’s been a dream of mine for a long time and when I finally fell pregnant through fertility treatment in 2008 I was super excited. After my daughter Sylvia was born I just fell in love with her straight away, her little tiny body, her feet and hands, her button nose and her baby smell.
I remember giving Sylvia her first bath at the hospital and putting almond oil on her skin. I did it because I was told I should. I was told what I should be doing a lot and really had no idea so I just did my best to care for this little human the best I could.
I think during the pregnancy I’d focused mainly on learning about pregnancy, the stages and focused on getting through being so unwell. Looking back I wish I’d read up more on looking after a baby as the role of motherhood hit me like a ton of bricks.
It wasn’t easy looking after my new-born I didn’t have a supportive partner and not much other support in the area I was living. Many people would tell me what to do, what I should do, what is best for the baby and I became very overwhelmed and stressed.
In the end I decided to do things my way. I chose not to listen to all the voices telling me different things. I figured out what worked for us and went with that. When my daughter was a few months old, I left her father. I had to take out a protection order and move to another city.
It was really tough becoming a single mum, but easier than living with a controlling man who was not treating me the way I deserved. I found the hardest part of caring for a baby was being stuck with the baby 24 hours a day. Some mothers love it some find it a huge adjustment.
Eventually I chose to place my baby girl into childcare. It was not an easy choice but I made the decision and went back to work as a relief teacher. Some days I worked, some days I just had time out to attend counseling and have some me time. I always got my baby girl back around 3pm and spent the evenings together before putting her to bed each night.
I moved close to my parents and my mum babysat one night a week so I could attend a class called “Breaking the cycle”. It was to help me become strong enough not to return to my daughter’s father. I loved having one night off a week and going to my class, it helped me grow emotionally and get stronger. I would also eat out and feel free just one night a week. On other nights, being a single mother once my child was in bed that was it I had to stay in the house.
It wasn’t a bad thing becoming a parent. It was wonderful. I loved being a mother from day one even though I did have a tough start and had to make difficult decisions for my daughter and I.
I’d love to have another child one day and I think I’d better know what to expect. I think the best advice is to follow your heart not the many voices telling you how to do everything. My daughter is now 8 years old and I’ve loved watching her grow and develop and it’s been a wonderful part of my life.
Thanks Angela for your New Mum Story.
If you are interested in joining the New Mum Stories series or any have any questions about featuring your story you can contact me at: firstname.lastname@example.org
I would love to read your stories.